Behind the Scenes of a Move

After my friends from Boston helped me unload the UHaul you see above on Friday afternoon July 28, Pedro and I prepared to spend our very first night in our new home. So did Racecar.

She did great with the move, though I had been worried about her. When I moved to Rainier, 8 years ago, Racecar was terrified of the new place. She found a hole in the bottom of the couch lining underneath it, climbed INSIDE the couch, and lived there for 3 days. She finally came out, but refused to leave the room the couch was in for 2 more days. After a week, this formerly outside-loving cat was only willing to sit on the deck a foot from the back door, and then race back inside for safety. It took her months before she acted like that house was her own.

She left the cat carrier cautiously, sniffed around the whole house for about 30 minutes, and then found a place to take a nap. She really wanted to go outside but I wouldn’t let her till the next day. The next day, she calmly explored most of the yard while I watched her anxiously, and then she found a place to nap on a pile of discarded blankets that had been used as packing material. That was the extent of it. Almost from the first moment, Racecar is content to be here. It’s a relief.

We had time to set up beds in the twins’ rooms Friday afternoon before their mom dropped them off, but not much more. The kids had previously chosen rooms, but their stuff was buried and wasn’t set up that weekend. But still, we had most of the family here right from the start.

There were more hiccups. I have washed feather pillows in the past. Not often, but occasionally it is time to clean them. I have put them into the washer and later pulled them out intact. This time – when I was racing to get the house emptied and cleaned – was of course the time for a pillow explosion! After the scenes above, I ran the washer about four times and the dryer four times, pausing and stopping them for cleaning over and over, till finally I believe the machines are cleared of sufficient feathers to leave them for the new owners. Periodically I had to sweep and vaccum the rest of the house, that was also filling up with errant feathers. Also, the lawn outside had a pile of feathers, where I had shaken out the rest of the laundry that had been washed with the exploded pillow. I ended up leaving a note for the new owners: About the feathers. No ducks were harmed in the selling of this home.

More friends appeared!! On Saturday, dear, dear friends drove down from Gig Harbor, Washington, to see their old favourite places (they used to live here), but then to roll up their sleeves and help. Kin & Noel were part of the crew who helped me move into my place in Rainier 8 years ago. This time, they joined us for several trips between Pedro’s townhouse and the new house, with our cars loaded with stuff. We wanted the help of my friend, Kin, because he’s a big Marine and could lift heavy stuff with Pedro better than Noel and I could. They brought housewarming gifts to include forearm lifting straps – so thoughtful and helpful. We all had dinner with them and their two little boys, and they told us about all their favourite restaurants from this part of town that we can try out now that we live here.

On Sunday, Kellen and Cameron arrived to help unpack a storage container that had been delivered to the new home. The container was Pedro’s idea and such a great idea for a move! They dropped it off in my driveway in Rainier and I just loaded things when I had time. Then, when I was all done, I called them to come get it. They were prepared to store it as long as necessary (with a monthly fee, of course). When we were ready, they dropped it in the driveway of the new house. We could take as long as we wanted to unload it. What a great convenience it was for us.

My kids told me they had a surprise visitor who was coming to help as well. I guessed and guessed about their old high school friends from Madison High School, but every guess was wrong. Finally he showed up and …well, I can’t even explain the depth of my feelings. But I’ll try because it was a hugely emotional day for me.

Back in another lifetime, I was the single mom of a teenager in the Montavilla neighborhood of Portland. My teen gathered around themself a group of the most special, beautiful, amazingly generous and aware and enlightened teen friends. It was a working-class neighborhood and everybody’s parents were gone at work after school, like I was. I think our house was chosen as the gathering spot because of its location. I came home from work often to the house filled with kids. One practicing on a portable drum set, a few sprawled on the floor playing games, two in the corner painting toenails, three on the couch having a lively debate about purebred animals or slam poetry. Pizza boxes showed that someone had ordered pizza. Someone would be making ramen in the kitchen. We had a TV, but it was almost never on.

It was a small house (700 square feet), so the teens were crammed in, sometimes shoulder to shoulder, one couple usually shared a single chair while they talked and laughed with the others. The scene made me feel good for a few reasons: partly because it’s handy when the hang-out spot is my house and that way I can be sure I know what my own kid is doing. But also because those kids made my heart swell. They were 16, 17, and 18 years old, all being kind and responsible, and caring for each other and having fun in healthy ways.

I’ve kept track of most of them. I know which colleges they went to, what jobs they’re now working at. I know that couple is still a couple – awwww – just like Kellen and Cameron were dating then and are still together now. But one of them I lost. He had a personal tragedy that involved injury and some public harassment, and he went off the radar completely. I was so desperate to check on him that once I drove to his family’s home, only to discover that they no longer lived there. Kellen and Cameron lost him too. That was years ago. We have all worried. I think of those kids as sort of “my” kids. And I have ached for years, worrying about this one young man.

But in July he reached out to Kellen and Cam and said, “Hey are you coming to Portland anytime?” And Kellen said, “Yes, we’re gonna help my mom move and you should help too.” And voila. There he was on my doorstep. I cried. I tried really hard not to. I tried not to make it awkward, but I didn’t realize how much worry I had bottled up till I saw him there, healthy, in front of me. He hung his head a little and looked up at me and smiled.

With Pedro’s 18-year-old twins here, now my house was filled with beautiful, unique, funny, marvelous young people once again. This time, every single one of them helping us unload and haul boxes and stack stuff in the storage sheds and carry furniture into the house. After we were all done, I pulled leftovers out of the fridge and set it all up on the table with a bunch of plates and the kids’ eyes opened in delight and they tucked in with gushes of “Thanks for the food!” and “This looks amazing!” I was having flashbacks about the old days when I came home from work. It was so healing for me. I pulled Pedro aside a couple of times, out of sight from the others, and bawled into his shoulder. Such relief and happiness.

I had an old letter, dated 2018 I think, that I had been carrying around in the Jeep. I just knew that one day I would see him again, and I had a few things to say of my love and appreciation and respect for him. So after the kids ate and they all went out to chill in the waning sunlight on the bed swing, I went out the Jeep and got the letter. I made sure it was in his hand when he hugged me goodbye that evening.

We hugged Kellen and Cameron goodbye. And then the twins’ mom showed up and we hugged them goodbye. Everyone had to go because in a few hours we were going to be on a plane to Washington, D.C.

…and that’s sort of how it went from June, through July, through August, through September. One thing after another after another. I’m cataloguing it all now for my future reference, if I ever wonder why I thought 2023 was such a busy year. :o)