Walk the talk

Ok, so, I was on Grand Ave downtown, working my way into the far left so that I could make the turn toward the Hawthorne Bridge and drop onto the I-5 north exit.

It’s the middle of the day downtown, so of course there is traffic, and I expect cranky drivers. Then, of course, the construction. I had forgotten that the far left lane must merge right before the Hawthorne Bridge.

I had been eyeing this woman in the lane to my right, obviously agitated. Her long brown hair pulled into a hurried knot at the back of her neck, she was hunched forward over the wheel, peering ahead through her glasses, willing the vehicles surrounding her to pick up the pace.

When suddenly confronted with a 10-foot glowing merge arrows, I touched the brakes and glanced into the next lane. The woman beside me had dropped back and left a nice opening for me to merge. “Awww, how nice,” I thought. I put on the blinkers and started to pull over.

Apparently, the gap had opened by accident, because as soon as she saw me moving over, she jammed on the gas, and honked at me! The woman remained obviously agitated as she came just shy of smacking the bumper ahead of her, and passive-aggressively refused to look my direction as she blocked my access.

Now, it’s midday traffic downtown, merging toward the Interstate, with construction. Of COURSE there’s an irritated person. That’s not why I’m writing this post.

I calmly waited until the caterpillar of metal crawled past, the irritated lady driving the last caterpillar segment, and moved into the space allowed me by a white construction truck. “Thanks, buddy!” I waved into my rear view, and pulled in behind Ms. Cranky.

She remained incensed. Talking out loud, gesturing in anger, hounding the back bumper of the poor soul ahead of her.

And then I noticed the bumper stickers on her car. Together they had a totally unanticipated theme. Coexist. Love Your Mother (Earth). Support your local grocer. Look WITHIN.

Bwwwaaahhhhh! Haaa Haaaaa!

4 thoughts on “Walk the talk

  1. Ha ha! I think, had I been in your shoes, I would have crashed from laughing so hard.

    Also, this is why my bumper sticker says “Yes, I am a bitch. Just not your bitch.” 😉

  2. I have a feeling the bumper stickers came with the car but then again, my sister is that kind of driver too. I don’t get it. My sister says she’s a nice person until she gets on the road. Today she got a speeding ticket and a warning. I don’t like to ride with her. I would have made space for you. 🙂 Thanks for sending me the link. This was before my time here.

    1. OH, I didn’t think of that – the stickers came with the car. That is a very reasonable explanation. Or maybe she was trying to be a better person with the stickers, and I caught her in the process of self-improvement.

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