Siona! This is a perfect question!
Responses to this should roll off all of our tongues: of course I write my own story! I assess my resources, make a decision, and voila, I make my own life happen.
…anytime I don’t answer like this, I know I am straying off my path. I have the fortune of having been born in, and raised in, the United States. I can’t speak for other places, but here I know that any individual can make anything happen.
Yes!! It *IS* the land of opportunity. There are no victims. No poverty, no minority status, no trauma that can hold us down if we don’t want it to.
And no, I was not born into security which makes me blind to reality. My obstacles are challenging. I came through darkness and I am sure I will walk through darkness again, but I refuse to think of it anything but opportunity to make myself even better.
This is brilliant, just brilliant. Thank you so much for having this question around, Siona, for me to find it on Thanksgiving Day. I give thanks to the circumstances that allowed me to be who I am in the place that I am, with the people who make it into my radar beam.
Everything good that’s ever happened to me has been because I both opened my heart, and because I also busted my ass to make it happen.
- Good relationship with parents? Because I had to grow and learn and work and agonize and be humble until I was ready for that relationship.
- Good Job? Because I had to sacrifice and be humble and work hard and maintain the utmost in ethical standards in order to get opportunities, then I had to be brave enough to take them, embrace them, and to believe that I deserved them.
- Loving healthy daughter? Because I had to give up my selfishness, and my ideals, and I had to sacrifice and open my heart to a love and a learning that would never ever have been possible without considering that my dreams were not reality.
- Loving partner? Because I had to SHUT UP for a change, and listen, and learn, and practice loving tolerance. That even deep deep down inside people are STILL different, and it’s a good thing. In fact, we are all different and it’s so beautiful. It’s a gift. Finally I learn how to appreciate another human being living his own difficult path with joy and pain, and in loving him for who he is, I manage to have a healthy relationship.
What is my relationship to my life story? Could an analogy be made to what I’ve learned in my human relationship? Perhaps loving tolerance is a factor in being happy with my life, and I certainly could practice it more. My life is what it is. As my awesome brother said in his blog “There’s nothing wrong with being unfocused and spoiled. It’s just a path.”
But I hold true to my agency in all this. My life is not a result of anyone else but me. Every single person on this planet is doing their own thing in a way it works for their own life. None of them are doing anything to me and my life. If I want a life in a certain way, I must go out and make it happen.
Comment from the old blog:
Beautiful response to this question and such a perfect reminder of why I love and admire you so much. You take complete responsibility for your life and seek always to evolve.
You are my first expression of gratitude on this crisp Thanksgiving morning. The Universe really blessed me with you and my heart is bursting with gratitude.
Oh, my lovely Ophelia. I return your gratitude with just as much gushing love. You are truly one of the greatest people to ever happen to me. You were and continue to be a major factor in my own ability to grow. Thank you for you.